Dinner tonight was very green. I had bought some sea trout from Paul the Fi sh this morning, along with some samphire. The season for English samphire must be over, I think, I’m not sure where this was from. But I bought it without thinking of its provenance. I’ve not felt like taking trouble over meals for the past few weeks, for various reasons – mostly because I’ve been so busy with the catalogue for the auction in October, but also because I struggle during the summer. Even when I’m not thinking of Russell and Tim, their illness and deaths cloud that time of the year. I’ve been feeling impatient with myself because I haven’t been the Z that I’m comfortable with. But tonight, I thought I’d make some pesto to spread on the fish and then bake – I had parsley and pistachios as well as the usual garlic, parmesan and olive oil and, it turned out, they suited very well together. I’d also got some young sprouting broccoli – or probably calabrese – and so the plateful was very green and I enjoyed it.

I walked a lot last week, which was also good for me – exercise has been limited with my surgical boot on and there’s no doubt that activity makes me feel brighter. The night before last, I went to bed early because I was exhausted (wish I could get over that, it’s so tedious) and I slept, with brief wakings-up, for hours and hours. Paid for it last night, when i was still awake at 5.30 am. I always seem to run on a sleep deficit, which is frankly a pain in the arse. It’s been the case pretty well all my life.

There was torrential rain and a thunderstorm in the night. I came downstairs to make sure water wasn’t getting in anywhere. Someone in Yagnub posted, on the local Facebook page, an amazing photo of a bolt of lightning that sparked along three street lamps simultaneously, though without doing any damage, remarkably.