Second Post

That’s what happens, you see, when I write early.  Vote early, vote often, as the saying goes.

Actually, “as the saying goes” (pronounced ‘goos’ or even ‘goo’) is, itself, a saying around here; amongst the older residents, that is.  Usually attached to something that isn’t a saying at all.

Anyway, what I have returned to say is that I’ve just got back from a parents’ evening at the school and my lovely Sage has cooked me my dinner.  I feel most awfully cherished.

It was the parents of the new pupils for September, and I spent an hour and a half bobbing up to strangers and engaging them in conversation.  A couple of other governors were there too, doing the same thing and at one point we all chatted together for a few minutes.  One of them said that she was never quite sure about volunteering to come in for things, she didn’t want to be intrusive.  I said I knew how she feels – “I don’t come over as diffident, but I have to make an effort not to be,” I said.  She told me that I don’t come over as diffident at all.

I know I don’t.  I don’t here, do I?  I’m confident and can talk a bit too much and have social skills and am not at all reticent.  Well, I’m not saying it’s put on, and I’m not saying that I’m shy, because actually, people who are really pretty brash and then say, coyly, “of course, underneath it all, I’m terribly shy” really quite piss me off, because I’ve been shy and I couldn’t possibly have done it then – and I like being outgoing better than I liked my many introverted years, and I don’t mind that I’m laying myself open to judgement because it’s a sign that I’m not afraid to be humble (a lot of shyness is actually pride, or at least it was with me) – however, it does mean that I have to be sure and do it constantly, or else it looks as if I don’t care or am uninterested.  When, in fact, I’m not quite confident that it’s appropriate for me to leap in and ask.

I’m getting better at it.  I really do try very hard.

Anyway, tomorrow is the Sage’s birthday, and he will be 74.  He doesn’t think of himself as ageing at all, and nor do I – that is, I know he is but he isn’t to me.  He’s just the same as ever, and I love him as much as ever.  His kindness and care when I was getting over my operation was, yet again, a revelation to me – after all these years, he can still surprise me.  And, after all these years, one can still be surprised to fall in love all over again, with the same person – even if you’ve loved him all along.  Which is rather more convenient than falling for someone else, of course.

11 comments on “Second Post

  1. 63mago

    In Franconia its past midnight and the new day has begun.
    My best wishes for the birthday of The Sage: Ad multos annos!

    I do not understand the most words in the fifth paragraph and am too lazy to look it up.

  2. Z

    Thank you, darlings.

    Okay, I paraphrase. I seem confident and it’s not an act, but that doesn’t mean that it comes naturally. I have to remember that I’m not shy any more, as hanging back makes me look as if I’m not interested, rather than as if I’m waiting for someone else to take the lead. I’m still learning, after all these years.

    I suspect we all are though.

  3. savannah

    And, after all these years, one can still be surprised to fall in love all over again, with the same person – even if you’ve loved him all along. Which is rather more convenient than falling for someone else, of course.

    The MITM just celebrated his 61st birthday and this past March, we celebrated 41 years of marriage! So, yes, I totally understand what y’all mean, sugar! xoxoxo

    Happy Birthday, Sage!

  4. Z

    It gets even better as time goes on, doesn’t it, Savannah? You’re lucky to have found each other so young.

    Indeed, Dave.

  5. PixieMum

    I understand about the shyness in the past and have ‘trained’ myself to cope.

    A few years ago there was a call for more members of the congreagation to read the lesson. Up till then there was no way I could have got up from the pew, walked along the parquet to the lecturn and read, but I set myself a challenge, attended the training session and now I am quite happy to read, even at a moment’s notice. Still would baulk at the reading which lists all the tribes of Israel with the unpronouncable names though!

    On the topic of falling in love, yesterday was our 31st wedding anniversary. It was celebrated in style, afternoon tea at Brown’s Hotel and then good tickets for Jersey Boys. I love my husband so much more than when we married under six months after meeting.

    Thank you for an enjoyable blog.


  6. Z

    Well, Alan, at least your link looks sort of relevant. But I’ve already got all the love I can deal with, thanks.

    Congratulations on your anniversary, Madeleine. I think the first thirty years are the tricky ones, if you still like each other after that, you’re doing fine! I’m so glad you’re still in love.

    I thought of you, with that photo of the cows in the river, when I was in Cookham last week.

    During our interregnum 3 years ago, I volunteered for the Harvest Festival sermon. It went fine, I made bullet-pointed notes but didn’t need to refer to them and I felt that I hadn’t forgotten anything or fluffed anything. Don’t think I need to do it again, though!

  7. luckyzmom

    I am surprised every once in awhile to realize how much in love I still am with my husband even though we still have a few kinks to work out after more than 34 years.


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