I missed a call from R, when I was out getting the chickens in. So we WhatsApped each other. They were at Istanbul airport, having missed their connection and had been put on a later plane. Apparently, the first aeroplane left Atlanta airport 3 hours late. Ugh. So they’re due to land at Heathrow at 10.30 tonight, 2 hours later than planned.

This scuppers the plan to get to Liverpool Street in time to get a late night train to Diss. There is a National Coaches bus that leaves Terminal 2 at 11.30, but they’ll be lucky if they disembark, reclaim luggage, get to the bus stop with a ticket, in time for that. So I’ll wait to hear where and when I’ll pick them up.

I’m so sorry for them. It was going to be a long, tedious journey and I can hardly imagine how exhausted they are already. Being perennially forward looking, whatever the odds, I took the view that at least I could have a glass of wine with dinner (I’d got alcohol free beer all ready).

They’ve got a number of options, when they finally get out of immigration – assuming they aren’t in time for the 11.30 bus – so I’ll make no plans until I hear. I’ve got a couple of things happening here, but as long as they don’t take the 8am train from Liverpool St, it’ll all work out. They will be so knackered, but at least we can take it easy for the next few days.

I am making some progress, remarkably, though there’s a lot of work to do.

I’ve spoken to three people who can help and we’re putting together statements for them to sign. I’ve got some papers, going back to 1980, including official government-related ones, that are indicating what I need them to. This would all be far easier to explain if I felt able to say what I’m talking about…

I’ve also attempted to make that phone call re listed building permission, but no reply, so I’ve texted.

Yesterday, I spent two hours sorting out and putting away china – about 500 pieces, 300 of which have been wrapped, 100 locked away and the rest sorted out, waiting to be wrapped – and then needed quite a long break for the rest of the morning. Luckily, my cleaners were coming (they only come once a month) so I didn’t have to clean the room too. It was very hot yesterday of course – the temperature went up to about 30ºC – but that room is west and north facing, so it was cool in the morning – I started about 8.30, so it would be ready for the cleaners and I didn’t have to risk doing the work myself.

The family is coming over to lunch on Saturday week, when R&V will be here, so I may need that room. If the weather is fine, we may well eat outdoors, but I can’t assume that.

R&V are on their way. It’s a strange journey as, because of the Olympics, air fares are expensive. They’re coming by Turkish Airways, via Istanbul. Then they’ve got to get across London and, hopefully, will catch the 10.30 train that gets to the local station about midnight. Failing that, there’s another at 11.30 but that’s the last train of the night.

Tomorrow morning, I’ve got a haircut and then later I’m meeting my sister and taking her to an appointment at the hospital (she never knows, at the eye clinic, if she’ll be able to drive afterwards). So R&V will have most of the day to relax and start to get over jet lag. The rest of the week will be fairly low key too.

However, after that I’m getting things organised. I’ve booked lunch on Sunday at a local, excellent restaurant. I need to talk to the family about the next few days, but have various things planned, including a visit to London (need to decide on the day and buy the train tickets and the London Eye tickets). On Thursday we’re having dinner in Norwich at a rooftop restaurant and the family will all be here on Saturday for lunch as I’ve already said. On Sunday, we’re off to Cambridge for the next two nights. On Tuesday, I’ve booked a visit to Kettle’s Yard, which is fabulous. Various things planned while we’re in Cambridge, of course.

Between today and Wednesday, I’ve got a lot to do. Really busy, so that I don’t have to do much while my American not-cousins are here. Of course, the result of knowing how very productive and organised I need to be was that I did nothing. I just faffed about all day.

I know it’s not just me, though some people blame their ADHD or some other condition that doesn’t permit them to do the necessary. I have no such excuse. Knowing that there’s a lot to be done, but not necessarily having a specific, timed deadline, I find it very hard to do anything at all. It’s like when you’ve got an appointment at noon, there’s plenty of time to do all sorts of things in the morning, but you just wait around because the prospect of that appointment supersedes everything else.

In the evening, a friend called round. I’d phoned yesterday asking him to – or anyway, I left an answerphone message. I was pleased to see him as I haven’t done so for months, but I was taken aback by the change in his appearance. He was always quite a burly man – not overweight, but sturdy and muscular and now he’s lost a lot of weight and is frail. I don’t know what’s wrong. But I explained the situation and he will help. Tomorrow, I must contact other people who can.

I should have phoned another friend about the listed building application – his wife thinks he might be able to advise – but of course I was paralysed by the prospect of busyness, so that’s another thing for tomorrow. I hope I sleep tonight so that I wake early and can get on, but I’m not depending on it.

I nearly didn’t bother with dinner, but I did pull myself together there, simple though it was. I cooked a bass fillet with runner beans and sautéed some garlic, tomato and courgette. I took it as some minor achievement, but I’m clutching at straws, really.

Oh, there was one more thing. I booked a hotel in Cambridge for a couple of nights, so that the US n-cs and I can have a couple of days there before they leave. And I’ve written some emails. I’m starting to feel that I did some useful stuff after all. I might even give myself 2 out of 10, but I think I’m just being kind.

L and L left this morning and phoned Wink later to say they’d arrived home safely. Apparently, tried to ring me and couldn’t get through – I think he must have got a wrong number, because my landline is certainly working. It’s been lovely to see them and it was a happy visit. Lynn is just in that sweet spot where she’s able to follow a conversation and join in, even though she doesn’t remember it a minute later. She enjoys it while it’s happening. L says that he’s so glad that her personality hasn’t changed. And it hasn’t, she’s sweet natured, polite and a pleasure to be with. She thanked me for having them to stay and the delicious food, though obviously she hadn’t a clue that Wink had been the host for most of the time. It doesn’t matter. The love between those two is heartwarming.

I’ve made a little progress on my worrying situation that I can’t talk about, for legal reasons. Having spent an hour this morning looking through papers – still can’t find the one that Russell did god knows what with, but I did come up with some useful ones – I felt panicky and my heart was racing, so I had to take a break. I did a couple more things this afternoon, so progress of a sort. It’s all dismal and it’s no wonder I’m upset. But there, nothing different from what it was a few days ago. I’ve just got a lot to do in the next three days.

Tomorrow, I’m meeting my sister and her house guests at a local inn for lunch. It’s the old friends whose Golden Wedding party we went to last September, down near Bristol. Lynn has now been officially diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, which she’s probably unaware of but, though he already knew, I suspect it’s painful to her husband. So he decided on a road trip to visit friends and family and, of course, they’ve got a standing invitation to visit us. They arrived last Saturday, I’m not sure how much longer they’re staying. Wink is taking over Izzy duties here for the next few days, so she’ll drive over and I’ll drive them back. I considered inviting them for lunch here, but I really am not much in the mood for preparing food for guests.

Tim and I went to the place I have chosen to meet, once. Five or six years ago, I suppose it was. It was the sort of meal that was okay, palatable, but clearly most of it was bought in and heated up to order. But it’s easy for Wink to find as it’s on the main road and not far from here, with plenty of parking, so it’s straightforward.

It’ll be the third meal out this week. On Monday, we met another friend at what has been a favourite restaurant about halfway between home and here, near Norwich. It changed hands in April, just before we went there as a whole family for Sunday lunch for Wink’s birthday. Surprised not to have Sunday roasts on the menu, but we had a good meal. On Monday, we found that the previously interesting menu was somewhat curtailed – of course, there’s nothing at all wrong with a relatively small menu but it wasn’t that, it was just less interesting. We all had fish and chips, which was a slight fallback – that is, it’s safe and normally reliable when you’re not sure what to choose. I think I was the unlucky one as the batter on mine was somewhat pasty on the inside and needed a couple of minutes more cooking – I always remove and leave the batter though, so it didn’t really matter. The fish itself and the chips were fine, though the peas could have done with another minute’s cooking – not easy to go wrong with frozen peas. I’m not sure that I’ll be in a great hurry to go back, which is a pity. It’s a great location and we’ve had many good meals there.

At the end of the month, my American not-cousins are coming to stay for a fortnight. I’m making plans for their visit.

I’m over at Weeza and co’s house at present, looking after Izzy while the family are in Crete. I met Ro in Norwich today for lunch – we went to Namaste Village, an excellent vegan/vegetarian restaurant. I chose the vegetarian Thali meal but I suspect it was actually vegan as the yoghurt had certainly never seen milk. It was the only part that was less than delicious, being slightly sweet and not yoghurty. Otherwise, excellent.

I used my bus pass for the first time. I’ve been eligible to have one since I was 60 I think – I don’t think that you actually have to be a pensioner, but not sure, but anyway, I’d never claimed it. In the last decade, until today, I’d used a Norwich bus exactly once. But, as I had to get a new driving licence and passport last year, I thought I might as well claim the bus pass. The park and ride bus isn’t free, but it’s £2 for a whole day ticket. Other buses are free and I’ve only just found out that London buses are too. I thought you could only use them in your own area.

I’m getting over a cold – I don’t think it was Covid as the current variant, pleasingly known as FLiRT, apparently has a constant cough and a high temperature as its main symptoms. I’ve had and still have a cough, but by no means constant and I haven’t had much of a temperature. I had to cancel several things, though, the weekend before last.

I was tired tonight and went to bed early. Too early for Izzy, who cried. So I got up and took her for a walk and am now waiting until 10.30, when she will deign to go to bed.

I’m still dreadfully despondent and that’s the reason I don’t often write. There are various things I don’t feel able to talk about – so much on my mind, far too much. And the upcoming 10th anniversary of Russell’s death and 3rd of Tim’s weigh heavily. I’m outward and upward looking, I do all the right things, but the fundamental lowness has to take its time to lift. If it does. My daughter wants me to ask for antidepressants, but she doesn’t understand. It’s cause, not effect that’s the problem. I can and do cope, I’m just so awfully sad. I hide it well, though. I don’t normally say anything.

In other news, I’m hugely tempted to buy an Aga kettle and a paddle for bread and pizza, which are 20% off in the sale. I don’t strictly need either of them, but I want them. I’ll sleep on it. It may well be that I’ll have come to my senses by the morning.

Yet another jolly, this time to London – to the Tate, to be precise.

In my position as programme planner for the local Nadfas, I do a bit of research into forthcoming exhibitions, particularly London ones and, of course, I trot along and visit them. We went to the Expressionist/Blue Rider one at Tate Modern back in April. Yesterday, we went to the other London Tate to see the John Singer Sargent portrait exhibition and the one of women artists in Britain over the centuries – though women were largely prevented from painting seriously, there were some very determined and talented ones whose works, while often not well known, are very worth seeing. The lecturer we had, back in the spring, had helped to curate this exhibition and it was good to have had some foreknowledge.

We didn’t really make the most of it however, so I hope we’ll have time to go back while it’s still on. Our lovely friend in Kent wanted to join us, but she’s hopeless at time and we spent far too long waiting for her, which curtailed our time at the exhibitions – we had to catch the 4 o’clock train back, which meant us leaving at 2.45, to be safe – and more of that in a minute. We said we’d wait for her and go in at 2 – we’d missed each other at the Sargent one as she was so late – but we had to give up and start without her, which only gave us half an hour. Wink has promised never to tell her about anything we’re doing, in the future, unless we have limitless time. We love her dearly, but she’s completely unaware of other people’s needs. Though she’s always apologetic, it doesn’t stop her.

Anyway, we left with plenty of time to spare, because you never can be entirely sure with public transport. The bus took nearly 10 minutes to come, but that was fine and we got off at Charing Cross, walked down to Embankment and got onto the Tube platform. We needed a Circle line train and all three on the board were District, the last arriving in 11 minutes. We were a bit worried at that point, as there was no guarantee that the next would be Circle. So I suggested we took the next train, got off at Monument and walked through the convenient underground walkway to Bank, whence it was one stop on the Central line to Liverpool Street Station. With me so far?

I said, when we get to Monument, we can look at the board and see if there’s a Circle train soon, when it’d be worth waiting. There wasn’t. That meant there must have been at least 5 District trains and over 15 minutes – might have been longer – without Circle, at the start of the rush hour on a Friday. Not vastly impressed. Anyway, all went well. We got to Liverpool Street at about 3.45 and were able to go straight onto the train, which left and arrived on time and we were home by 6. Lucky with the weather, it’s bucketed down today, with thunder and lightning at one point.

Back to London again next week, for Wimbledon. We’ve got off-peak tickets this time, no particular train, so can leave when we want. If it’s peak time, we’ll have dinner somewhere on the way back.

As far as my father was concerned, it was the Other Place, the village on the Cam that wasn’t worth noticing, so I never went there until after he died. I don’t know if it’s the same now but, 50-odd years ago, the Oxford/Cambridge rivalry was real.

Today, I went with the local Nadfas group there – I still call it Nadfas, but it changed its name a few years ago. We went to the marvellous Kettles Yard and then to Kings College Chapel, with a leisurely lunch between and a stroll afterwards. So beautiful there. When cousins Rhonda and Victoria visit, I plan to take them there. They’ll be bowled over.

They’ve got unfortunate timings for their plane journeys. I don’t know when they’ll arrive on the 31st, but they leave Heathrow at 6.30am on the 13th August. I just can’t inflict a train journey, arriving at midnight, on them so I’m hoping to have a couple of nights somewhere nice, within an hour or two of the airport, to drop them off – probably still around midnight, but at least they will have had a good dinner and not a long journey before their start – and then carry on westwards to Pembrokeshire for a few days. Anyone got any thoughts? I’m wondering about Salisbury, but maybe somewhere closer? Just a few good places to see, arriving lunchtime Sunday 11th (I’m planning a family meet-up on the Saturday) and leaving late Monday night. It’s tight timing, so maybe nearer here, as then I won’t be doubling back. Oxford? Or maybe, making the Cambridge visit on the way and staying near there for a couple of days. Really not sure, at present.