This is what we were up to a year ago. Happy first anniversary to my youngest children, Ro and Dora.
Although it was such a happy day and I was determined that no sad thoughts would mar it, the fact is that it was only just over three weeks since Russell had died and a week after his funeral. I hadn’t told you that he’d died then, not here – I had written to a number of you individually, but I wasn’t ready to let go of this as my happy place. It couldn’t go on, of course, impossible to pretend for long.
Today, I had very mixed feelings and I didn’t want to stay here alone, so I decided to go shopping. First, I went to Yagnub, bought a chocolate fudge cake at the deli (and cheese, a tart and some patum peperium), then I bought a card, filled the car with diesel, beastly stuff (always get it on my hands, even when i wear disposable gloves) and drove over to their house, to give them the card and cake.
After I left them, I went into Norwich. Well. Not a lot of nice clothes, I have to say. It was all so dull. I had money burning a hole in my pocket, as they say, and would have bought whole lots, from a coat to underwear, with everything in between, if I’d liked it – but I didn’t even try anything on. So I went off to Chapelfield Gardens to see Roses and Lawrence, who were running a coffee stall at the food festival. I had a crispy duck wrap for lunch and then hit the food tent. Half an hour later, i staggered out with several bags of goodies, including half a dozen bottles of Norfolk wines – not absolutely sure about the pinot noir, but I’ll give it a fair crack.
This evening, I’ve eaten the tart (Roquefort, pine nuts and spinach) and a slice of lovely, chewy sourdough bread, and about a pound of nuts – that is, i haven’t eaten a pound of nuts, I’ve discarded the shells, but I simply cannot resist fresh cobnuts or walnuts and I’ve pigged out.
I’m not easily discouraged and I wanted to buy clothes, so i called in at the little dress shop in Yagnub on the way home and I’ve bought a dress, a pair of jeans and a stripy, long sleeved, teeshirt. I really do still need a new coat, though. And underwear. I haven’t bought a single garment, except shoes, for fourteen months, and then that was my wedding outfit – which used a normal year’s budget in one go, frankly.
Early night, darlings. I’ve been awake since 5. I’ll let Eloise out, feed Roses’ cat Rummy, make a cup of tea and head for bed with the papers. I chuck ’em on the floor when I’ve read them and clear up every couple of days. Good job I sleep alone, I have a pile of books and papers next to me on the bed, and a pile of discarded ones on the floor. I don’t care.