The Sage learns how to argue, but still is wrong

Last night, or this morning, I was in bed soon after midnight and the Sage (having already had a little zizz) joined me, freshly bathed, soon after. A hug and kiss and I was ready to fall asleep, when he started a business discussion.

Now, a brief exchange of interesting news is one thing, but this was a quite big change of business policy with which I radically disagreed. I said so. He replied. We weren’t quarrelling, you understand, but there was a need for a major discussion here.

“Darling, it’s quarter past midnight and I was nearly asleep. I really don’t want to talk about it now, you can’t land something like that on me at this hour of the night”. Fortunately, he agreed. However, he was not at all sleepy. It was after one o’clock, the last time I looked at the clock.

We discussed it again this morning. It was a splendid discussion, all respectful and forceful without any lack of respect for the other’s view and a clear allowance of space for hearing one viewpoint before coming up with the other’s.

He seems to have agreed with me. Good man. Maybe it was a good thing, explaining my tactics in an argument. We kept very focused and itemised all pros and cons – and then he realised I was right all along.

If he’d been, I’d have said so. I’d have said he was wonderful too. Actually, I might have said that at some time anyway.

15 comments on “The Sage learns how to argue, but still is wrong

  1. dharmabum

    awww…what a way to begin the day – thanks Z, this couldn’t have gotten any better.

    it is wonderful to have such a discussion – to try n remain as objective as we possibly can, respect the other persons view, debate it, yet not let it turn into an argument that is personal. i LOVED this totally.

    thanks for sharing this, you made my day

  2. Z

    Dave, you’re too young to spend your evenings asleep in your chair. Mind you, I love an afternoon nap and that’s when the phone always rings.

    It really was a business discussion on an important matter. But where my total, absolute saintliness came in was in not losing my rag when he broached the subject out of nowhere at 12.15 am, when I was nearly asleep.

    Ooh, maybe your phone call was at 12.15am, Dave. In that case – well, it’s lovely to have a chat, isn’t it?

  3. Dave

    Well no, it was a text message at about 11 pm; followed by another (after I’d turned the light out and decided to settle down to sleep properly) apologising in case it had woken me up.

    I do, however, really enjoy the drunken texts I have received a couple of times in the early hours of the morning. No, really. It makes sleeping worthwhile.

  4. Wink

    Get a grip kiddo, I’ve known you all your life and you’ve never been boring – a pain, I’ll allow on very rare occasions but boring, forget it!

  5. Wink

    Sorry Dave, I’ve yet to read your blog but having read your comments on Z’s, I find it hard to believe you know how to be boring!

  6. Murph

    I think it’s a male-female thing, this “being right” gene. 😉

    There was an ad in our paper last week “Full Set Encyclopaedias for sale. Genuine reason for sale as now married. Wife knows everything.”

    We’re all missing your absence though Z!

  7. Z

    Crumbs, how gratifying, I only missed one day. Thank you all, darlings.

    Murph, if ever I’m in doubt, I usually ask a dog.


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