Still fabulous care at the hospital, we actually went in 20 minutes early – or rather R did, I was doing the Times crossword on my iPad. And we’ve shared a steak for dinner and he will have some ice cream later.

There’s just been a flash of lightning and, some seconds later, a roll of thunder – loud enough to make Ben jump.  Heavy rain now, so it’s good that the tortoises are tucked up in the dry and that I don’t have to go out again apart from a brief trot round with the dog.  Let’s face it, if it’s pouring, he doesn’t want a long walk either.

I have to admit the stress has got to me.  I had email notification that it was time to pay my Barclaycard, so I logged on to my Barclays phone app – and found that I’d got a mere £20 in my bank account.  Eeeeeek! That never happens, but I skimmed through and everything seemed ok.  So I thought I’d look on the computer because I wasn’t enjoying the tiny screen, but it wanted me to put my card into the reader (I’m a latecomer to internet banking, I’ve had this gizmo for a while but never used it before).  I was asked to put in my PIN.  Which was refused.  I tried again.  Um.  So I used the same PIN on the phone app and that was fine.

I worked out the expenditure, which was that I’ve been paying for Russell’s extravagances (I’m not going to tell you how much he paid for a vesta case [otherwise known as a matchsafe] because I wouldn’t want to appal you) and he had meant to pay me back and hadn’t got around to it, and he agreed to pay some money directly into my account straight away.  So we headed into town.  And the nice teller handed me the reader.  I explained my problem: that I’d made two wrong attempts.  She reminded me I needed my card PIN, not my app one.  Oh.  Ok, it worked and the transaction was made, and she said she could pay the Barclaycard bill from the reader… Oh.  She couldn’t, I hadn’t got it set up.  “I might as well do it from my phone,’ I said, being in the swing of things by now.  And I gazed at the request for the PIN and realised it was yet another number.  Which showed I was back on form, because I didn’t do it wrong and then realise. I just nearly did.

I’ve got it sussed now, I know that I know all the separate PINs and which applies to which.  But I’m not soon going to forget the blind panic that I felt for a couple of minutes, when I felt that I was completely losing the plot, could remember nothing and didn’t know how to put it right.  It now feels like a storm in a teacup, but it wasn’t when it happened.  And yes, I overreacted.  And, if I feel near an edge, it’s understandable.  I’ll just be slower and more careful for a bit.

Now for the upbeat –

1 We’ve just had raspberries and ice cream.  It was very nice

2 It’s stopped raining and I’m not going to have to water the garden for a while, even if we don’t get any more.

3 Russell bought Ben a new teddy bear from a charity stall.  He loves it and hasn’t pulled the stuffing out (yet).

4 I’m going to make coffee now.

5 I started a cold in the night, dammit.  If it doesn’t go by the morning, I shall make a masala omelette with a whole lot of chilli.  That’ll see the bugger off.