Steady Z

Today has been a bit intense in some ways – there’s a lot I want to say, but whether it’ll be for publication is a different matter.  I don’t know yet – let’s see.

As I mentioned, I’m moving towards finding a replacement as chairman of governors.  There’s bad news – but not entirely.  There had been reaffirmation of commitment and support, which is wonderful. However, that’s been it.  Okay.  More strings to bow.  I’ve been thinking it through, bottom-linewards.  I still feel quite strong and capable, it’s all right for now.

I had lunch with M, who is vice-chairman and also, and quite irrelevantly to that, broken her leg.  We’re tremendous friends and we talked about things, which has given me some clarity of mind and her also, I hope.  And I may come back to this – I’d love to know your take on things, but if I tell you, it has to be written down all in one go.  If I save a draft, I delete it later.   It’s like conceptual art but without the money – once expressed, it’s done with.

Anyway, I was cooking dinner later – salmon kedgeree, if you’re interested, and queen of puds will follow because leftovers will rule in this house for the rest of the week – and Gill, Ben’s missus, phoned.  Andy’s leg isn’t fully healed because the steroids he has to take have inhibited bone growth and mending.  She can get about the house without a stick, but it takes backbone not to limp.

I’m a rock, darlings, my role is the supportive one.  You can rely on me if you’re in a fix.  I’ve assured her that Ben is fine here, we love him and will look after him for as long as they need us to.  It’s clear that she’s not sure if she can cope with him again – that’s up to them.  She and Andy need to talk it through and make their decision.  If it’s to have him back, of course that’s fine and if not then they can talk to us and we’ll say whether we are willing to keep him or whether we’ll look after him until he can be re-homed.

The Sage and I have had a brief chat on the subject and our reaction is decided, but no more on that at present.

Never has ‘pfft, it’ll be fine’ been a better path to follow.

But I was just about to send this out when the phone rang.  It was Marian, saying that our friend Elspeth has died.  This was not unexpected as she had lung cancer – I last saw her 6 weeks ago and then she knew that this was her last remission.  She’s been in a hospice for three weeks.  Pfft doesn’t cut it here, does it?

8 comments on “Steady Z

  1. Liz

    Ben sounds like a handful. Mind you, most dogs are. It is unfortunate that more people don’t think about the hard work involved before they get themselves a dog.

    Sorry to hear about your friend. I remember you posting a few weeks ago that she was too ill to have anyone other than family visit.

  2. Z

    She said yesterday, he’s bigger than either his parents are and they hadn’t expected that – mind you, I remember the first time I saw him pointing out the size of his paws, I knew he’d be a big dog!

    I’m afraid this is a different friend, I went to Jill’s funeral a couple of weeks ago. Thank you.

  3. Zig

    death is hard to talk about or even think about, sorry about your friend.

    Ben is delightful, if I had room I’d have in a heartbeat, as will you I expect … hope so anyway I have been so enjoying reading his posts!

  4. Z

    The debilities of old age are too – many of my friends are much older than I am and a number of them are quite clear-eyed about it all.

    Yes, he is, but he’s hard work. There would certainly be a few things I’d work on changing about his behaviour.

  5. mig

    So sad to lose an old friend. However much you knew it would happen it’s never easy.

    Lovely Ben – lucky you’re there to keep him safe till his people know whether they can manage him.


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