Not a peeping Z

I’m on a few committees, so have a lot of personal email addresses in my address book, quite apart from those of friends.  And nowadays, most people have more than one address, and most husbands and wives have separate addresses.  I still have a couple of women whose addresses are in their husbands’ names, and a couple of others who include the initials of the whole family (although that doesn’t mean that the other members don’t have their own too, and I bet they have).

I have several email addresses myself – one anonymous-ish, one specific to a job and two general, and the Sage has three, one for his business, one for a society he runs and his BT one, which he never uses.

And that’s one thing – I never use (or have him use) a service provider’s address, because people take no notice of what your email address is.  You change it, you tell them, you ask them to delete the old one – and they don’t.  Some do, most don’t.  I used to use AOL (I know, darlings, someone has to) and, two or three years after I changed provider (because they didn’t do broadband for Macs … bet they do now) I was told indignantly by someone that I hadn’t given them my new address. I’m a polite woman, but not a walkover, so I replied from an email that they had sent me to that new address that I had told them about a very long time previously.

Anyway, no matter, my point is that I only use free and non-affiliated addresses, such as gmail.

But this is all a preamble.  Because you gotta have a preamble, have you not?  Actually, I’ve had a sudden flashback there to Frankie Howerd saying “The Prologue” in Up Pompeii.  But then, I always had quite low tastes.

It was only a year ago I bought the Sage his own computer – I thought it was two, but I had the guarantee extension paperwork through recently, so it was only a year … and he’s been happily glued to it ever since.  When he needs to learn something new, he asks me, I show him, and all is mostly fine.  For the last few months, he has graduated to using email.  I used to write his emails.  I was his secretary, PA, whatever – thing is, I read out the email and he’d either dictate a reply or tell me what he wanted to say and I’d write it.  But finally, he started to read and reply to his own emails.

Now, I have his password – he chose it, but he’d forget it in a moment and I have to tell him if he gets logged out.  But I have gone from checking his emails twice, at least, a day, to almost never looking at them.  Because, that would be like reading his letters.  I don’t do it without permission.  If he wants help, such as attaching photos in a reply, he comes to me because the pics are on my computer.  I’ve had occasion to look up an email when he’s out a couple of times, but it’s made me feel quite uncomfortable and I’ve told him straight away.

And, although he could if he wanted to (we’re all linked together), I’d hate it if he was reading my mail.  It’d be so intrusive, even when one has nothing to hide.

11 comments on “Not a peeping Z

  1. Liz

    I’ve got 4 email accounts if you include the BT one that I have never even logged into and my work email.

    I have made the mistake of using internet provider email addresses and you are right, no one takes any flipping notice when you pass them your new email address. I’m sticking firmly with Yahoo (and hotmail for certain purposes) from now on.

  2. von LX

    I have four e-mails accounts that I actively use, depending upon the business at hand.

    Ex used to throw away my mail, magazines, and other personal items without asking. I therefore never gave her access to my e-mail.

  3. Tim

    I have just the one email address, which I haven’t changed for six years. I feel quite inadequate. Perhaps I’ll go in on Friday and set up a few more, just to liven things up.

  4. Z

    People may add your new address, but they don’t delete the old one and, especially if you’re in a group, it autofills with that. It happens to be hotmail and gmail for me.

    A friend, soon after moving out of the family home at his wife’s request, found that she’d put all the household bills in her name without warning him, including the internet provider – which meant he lost his entire address book. Not maliciously, just couldn’t give a.

    Darling John and Tim, you lead such uncomplicated lives. I am in awe. John, I didn’t leave a comment on that picture today. If I had, it would have been in regard to the need for life-long waxing…but actually, I was lost for words.

  5. mig

    We’re a bit behind you – Barney is just beginning to think he may want his own computer after ten years of me doing all his official online work as well as his emails.
    He wants to design stamp display sheets so I’ll be teaching him how to use word – or sending him on a course!

  6. Z

    It’s having a purpose that gives the incentive – in the Sage’s case, it was bloody eBay (pace, Rog). He buys, not sells. The house was overfull already.

  7. cogidubnus

    I’ve three email addresses, one a corporate one for work only, one a general one for personal correspondence, and the final one used for dealing with people I’m not 100% sure of…(seems pretty reasonable to me)…

    My wife’s got two or three addresses too, and gets pretty confused between them…but although I sometimes help her get access to her email accounts, I’d never dream of actually opening one of her mails…they’re her business not mine…

  8. Z

    I have to remember all passwords, the Sage won’t. And he does ask me for help reasonably regularly, and it is a business account – but I used to read them all the time and my feelings about that changed abruptly the moment he learned to email.


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