Z really must spend a couple of hours winding down

I think my gate latch theory is correct. The bullocks are tranquil in their field, anyway.

Today has been long and it’s not 7 in the evening yet. I woke before 3 this morning, which is not unusual and, about an hour later, had to jump out of bed with agonising cramp, the sort that leaves your calf muscle feeling bruised for hours. There’d been no likelihood of sleep anyway, not for a few hours – and when I felt I might doze for an hour or so, Eloise decided she’d like an early breakfast. She wouldn’t be deterred, so I finally went down and got breakfast for both of us. I ate mine in bed. I’d said to the Rector that I’d try to make it to church, for the first time this year (of course, there were only online services for a long time) and he’d changed the service from 9.30 to 9, which isn’t the best time. But I was there and it was nice to see the few people who were there too, except that when someone kind asks how I am, I cry.

I got home to find a phone message from a friend, asking me to ring back but she might be out – as she was, when I tried. I made coffee and contemplated clearing up the disaster area I call the kitchen, when a lovely friend, a different one, called round. So I made more coffee and we chatted. Then Wink called in with a bag of kindling, so I introduced them, and then the phone rang, twice, the second time being the friend who’d phoned before. While I was talking to her, having left Wink and Mimi, my mobile rang. I had to ignore it and phone Indigo Roth back when everyone had left. By this time, it was 1 o’clock and Ronan and family were due soon. I softened some Baron Bigod cheese in the microwave for ten seconds and spread it on bread, apart from Eloise cat’s share.

Busy afternoon with the family, we made and ate scones, fed the chickens, all the usual family stuff, then I scrambled eggs for their tea. And now I’ve fed the cats and I’m tired out. I seem to have spent a lot of time running. I do hope I sleep tonight because I need to crack on with the to-do list tomorrow or else I’ll regret it.

Remembered a couple of bills that I needed to pay and also paid a subscription that technically isn’t due for a few weeks. Must pick up a couple more things of Tim’s that I don’t want to run out. There’s a level of stress that energises you, but this isn’t it.

I was going to bake a potato for my supper, but I don’t think I could eat it. There’s one egg left, laid today, so perfect for poaching. Either I’ll eat it tonight or have it for breakfast tomorrow. The fishmonger will call in the morning and I’ve asked Wink in for supper. I have spinach and that is perfect with fish. I also have a squash, so that’s also good. I will think of a lovely fish dish. I also must make bread in the next few days. I now have three jars of sourdough starter in the fridge and half a dozen slices of bread. I’ve never tried my multi-grain, multi-seed bread with that, but I think I’ll give it a go. It may be heavy, but if it’s a failure the chickens will love it and if not, I will. I’ll probably eat it anyway, I don’t mind bread that’s a bit solid as long as it tastes good.

Actually, I think poached egg with spinach will be perfect tonight. I’ll have a glass of wine first and then cook it. The thought of a lovely, light meal has cheered me. I’m still ruled by food, which is an entirely good thing, because it’s good food that I love.

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