Between today and Wednesday, I’ve got a lot to do. Really busy, so that I don’t have to do much while my American not-cousins are here. Of course, the result of knowing how very productive and organised I need to be was that I did nothing. I just faffed about all day.
I know it’s not just me, though some people blame their ADHD or some other condition that doesn’t permit them to do the necessary. I have no such excuse. Knowing that there’s a lot to be done, but not necessarily having a specific, timed deadline, I find it very hard to do anything at all. It’s like when you’ve got an appointment at noon, there’s plenty of time to do all sorts of things in the morning, but you just wait around because the prospect of that appointment supersedes everything else.
In the evening, a friend called round. I’d phoned yesterday asking him to – or anyway, I left an answerphone message. I was pleased to see him as I haven’t done so for months, but I was taken aback by the change in his appearance. He was always quite a burly man – not overweight, but sturdy and muscular and now he’s lost a lot of weight and is frail. I don’t know what’s wrong. But I explained the situation and he will help. Tomorrow, I must contact other people who can.
I should have phoned another friend about the listed building application – his wife thinks he might be able to advise – but of course I was paralysed by the prospect of busyness, so that’s another thing for tomorrow. I hope I sleep tonight so that I wake early and can get on, but I’m not depending on it.
I nearly didn’t bother with dinner, but I did pull myself together there, simple though it was. I cooked a bass fillet with runner beans and sautéed some garlic, tomato and courgette. I took it as some minor achievement, but I’m clutching at straws, really.
Oh, there was one more thing. I booked a hotel in Cambridge for a couple of nights, so that the US n-cs and I can have a couple of days there before they leave. And I’ve written some emails. I’m starting to feel that I did some useful stuff after all. I might even give myself 2 out of 10, but I think I’m just being kind.
I know those feelings only too well. I think the thing is that when you (one) have (has) so much to do, it’s hard to appreciate exactly how much you do do.
Why is admin so hard in this day and age? Everything that used to take half an hour now takes a whole morning. Technology is supposed to help,not hinder!
“…though some people blame their ADHD or some other condition that doesn’t permit them to do the necessary. I have no such excuse.”
And that is it, exactly, an excuse. I do not believe in ADHD, either in children or adults (and I’m saying that as one qualified to diagnose it). I think there are plenty of better explanations. Just look at the NHS waiting lists for ‘diagnosis’ to realise it is just a social phenomenon of our age.
You don’t go from near zero cases 25 years ago to around 10% now (US figures higher than UK) without some factor operating now that wasn’t invented then. And don’t foget the push by Big Pharma to make loadsamoney selling medication to ‘cure’ what is actually not a problem, if people would live life rather than live life online.
Agree with you and BW.
Well, I’m not going to comment, because I don’t know enough for an informed opinion. I don’t think the name of it is useful because calling it a “disorder” is unhelpful. I also don’t like neurodivergent and neurotypical because who’s to say? I don’t see how you can diverge without specifying what’s typical and that’s not possible.