I’ve pretended to be productive. I’ve been quite busy but I’ve been faffing round the edges rather than getting on with the really necessary bits. Not sensible but I need a bit more backbone yet and I’m feeling emotionally wobbly again. I know it’s going to happen, on and off, for months at least and I just have to bear it until it fades into the background for a bit, recognising that it’ll whack back over me again at some time. This isn’t for me, saying this, it’s for anyone who’s been bereaved. It’s awful and just hang on.
Anyway, I’ve put a lot of Tim’s CDs on shelves and all his DVDs. I’ll play them, gradually, and find out what I want to put on to my computer and what I’ll not listen to again. We took hundreds to the recycling place – the ones that he’d stored in the spare bedroom were the ones we reckoned he’d decided not to keep. He always bought music – though he did listen to Spotify too – because he supported musicians.
I often listen on Spotify to music I’ve bought, so that the musicians get paid a bit, all over again.
I’ve also set up all his audio stuff and his tv. I have merely put them in place though, someone who cares about subwoofers and so on can actually do the wiring up. I took photos as we took everything apart, that’s good enough for my contribution.
Tomorrow, we’ll see. I hope I manage something useful.